I remember the last day of school

Saying to myself this summer will rule

Thinking of all the great that will come

Boy now that I think of it I feel so dumb…

Your face shocks me.
Deep heavy lines of stress,
scatter your face.
Looking like a jagged highway.

The last time we parted I still loved you…
This time, I pity you.

I remember the last day of school

Saying to myself this summer will rule

Thinking of all the great that will come

Boy now that I think of it I feel so dumb…

Today is the first day of Ramadan. I am not sure if many people know that, but Muslims around the world are fasting today. Let me back up a bit. Ramadan is the 9th month of the lunar calendar.

I had been working practically all the time this summer. I recently quit and decided to spend some quality time with friends and family before my return to P-town.

11 days 03:39:21

The wind carried November’s dried leafs onto the balcony only to be kicked off seconds later by a pair of cheap but fashionable black dress shoes. The man that filled the shoes was young, a few years out of high school, and already on the path of success at 20, he stepped out onto the balcony to watch his beloved walk to the nearest convenient store for cigarettes and soda.

When in Rome was a great movie to watch. It was about a woman named Beth (Kristen Bell) who is in love with her job. She had given up on love and romance and doesn’t care about anything except for her job. When she found out her sister was engaged and soon to be married to someone whom she had only knew for 2 weeks, she was shocked…

As everyone all knows the 4th of July was the day America got their independence. It was a great and proud day for all Americans to finally be free from Britain. Zzzzzzzzz…enough history lets talk about our modern day 4th of July. Nowadays, people head out to the…

“What do you want?” she asks you, you know what she means, she (and others like her) have asked you questions like this since the day you came into this place, but you fight her anyway.

Senior year was a great year for me. It opened many doors but in the other hand I also closed some. It feels like yesterday I was waking up six thirty in the morning to get dressed for school. Walking in the hallways, going to my classes’ science, math, history, and best of all lunch. I remember cracking jokes with my friends, studying for finals, and then the day finally came when we had to say good-bye. I woke up the last day of school with mixed emotions. I didn’t know whether to be happy for graduating and going to college or sad that I was going to leave some of my closest friends and best teachers.

I mean, what could have been so bad to make me wanna die? I don’t think I want to remember, but the thing I do remember the most holding five pills in my right hand and my cell phone in my left.

Caps, Gowns, Balloons and ribbons

A day students will always remember

A day they all cant wait for

Dreaming of walking down the aisle

You know, most things don’t bother me, I don’t let it, but when I get close to someone I hate to see them leave my side, being here at Alexian Brothers does not help much, people are always coming and going and I’m left here to watch them. Sure, you people would say I did this to myself, I did, but have a little compassion, let a girl have a friend

“It’s frustrating”
I say this only because
Of the lack of words
That exist
I can correctly use to—
Describe this suffocating
Emotion that overtakes me.

She rocks on a rocking chair like a metronome.
Her body is bent like the handle of her cane,
which is an extension of her radius and
reaches spider webs under the living room desk.

She listens to the heartbeat of the grandfather
clock. Her wooden rocking chair rocks to its tick tock.
Like the ticking time bomb in her own heart. Like the
timer that counts seconds ‘til her own ticking stops.

Her map-like lips wring into a half-moon smile
at the thought of her burnt fragments like wooden dust
gathered into an urn and set atop her son’s
fireplace next to pixilated memories
of new generations’ firsts. Like those picture frames,
her vase tomb will be dusted and its surface shined
by a hand who’s exterior doesn’t yet turn
to crumbs like her own, but a hand that clung to her
finger as she rocked its silken body to sleep,
listening to the tick of time as she does now.

Do you feel the cold chill flowing in,
do you wish to run from all your sin,
are you never alive, but not yet dead,
do you wish to sleep forever ?
                             we, were never ment to be.
                              because you, dont even see me.

* I love you summer because of your beautiful warm weather

* I love you summer because of your great vanilla ice cream I eat

 
You know, most things don’t bother me, I don’t let it, but when I get close to someone I hate to see them leave my side, being here at Alexian Brothers does not help much, people are always coming and going and I’m left here to watch them. Sure, you people would say I did [...]

The semester is coming to an end and final projects are keeping me busy. This project is a collaboration with Zach Dalin for IM 115, a programming class using robots.

It’s finals week at school and I’m being bombarded with work! I’m excited for a few new things:

1. My new website
2. Summer vacation
3. Living in AXO next semester
4. Fall 2010 class schedule

This year has been amazing and I can’t wait to return in the fall!

Illustrator CS4 is so much better than the CS3 version.

Fall above the clouds,
flow with the wind.
Spread your wings,
and soar with the spirits.
Let luna’s light guide you,
feel her cool, soft rays,
caress your skin.
Soft as a rose petal,
cradled in a gentle stream.
A whirl of thought,
unknown passion for nature,
a ravenous lust,
vicious love for shadows.
Seduction.
Ebony wings intertwined,
with whisps of darkness.
Falling constantly.
Ever changing,
never knowing.
Ever living,
never dead.

Press your knees
against cold concrete.
Concentrate
on holding your hands together:
each part of your palm
must touch
each part of your other palm.

Run-on sentence thoughts of
willow-tree swings,
grass between your toes,
and always avoiding
the cracks in sidewalks.

Focus
on your hands-
the skin touching.
Lean forward,
keep your fingers together
and all your weight on your knees.

Daydreams of
plastic-bag sleds
and itchy fingers,
warming above the stove.

My body sways-
focus.
Bring all the weight forward.
A little slip of thought:
left-over paint on my fingers.
I lean back
and sit on my heels.
I gave in
to distraction- a sin.

1. I exist because I feel the sensations of my body.

My body is stiff and numb, but my blood pulsates like a tidal wave.
My stomach is one with the bed; I couldn’t move if I wanted to- Bed would scream.
My eyes are closed shut, but not too tight; I’m “sleeping.”
My ears are attentive to the floorboards creaking.

2. People always want more.

I give you a hug in a gift bag. You take a kiss. I give you a peck wrapped in a bow. You take my whole body. I wrap myself in Christmas wrapping paper.  You skin me and take out my attributes. One by one: my heart went first. Then, my ovaries and my uterus, my vagina went last. I offered you my trust and you stole my womanhood.

3. Words never suffice what I want to say, so why bother?

Prickly fingers. Prying, cautious fingers. Curious fingers. Careless fingers touching. Fingers. Forcing fingers. Teaching a hand to touch. Not just fingers.
My hand. Your fingers.

4. Your life has purpose.

Your skin is a paintbrush, stroking against me- the canvas. You paint me. I’m given a shape. A color. I am your Frankenstein.

5. Everything happens for a reason.

Now, I’m more conscious of my body. I hide my entire self under the covers. I won’t drift to sleep unless every inch of my skin is safely hidden. The blanket is my cocoon, sheltering my sexuality.

6. Every day is a new day.

The day has cleansed itself of night. You have cleansed yourself of your other self: you smile, make jokes, and speak to me.

7. Love makes me do stupid things.

I store my pocketknife and all its possible consequences under my pillow. I’ve forgiven you for the day, but at night, I may reconsider.