20.Jul.2010 Light Years

My summer began like crap.

The kind of crap that was left by a dog that was pissed on by a rabbit-cat, scooped in a paper bag and set on your doorstep, on fire.

In all of its craptality, my teen angst comes in with a big old plate of daily depression. Because of this state, in a flurry of its madness, I chop off my hair and cry from regret. I hate thinking like a teenager without any control with the constant hormone outbursts and letting it get to me. I’d much rather like acting like a five year old.

Then comes summer school. Just when I get my computer in the mood to let me finally play my RPGs. I feel completely confident in my studies and I’m pretty arrogant on how much I already know so I keep having this harboring feeling that I don’t need to go there.
But, I still go for the credit.

There are too many people telling me to do things for them, and I’m just getting sick of it. I will and can do it, it’s just the pressure that’s annoying me.

The feelings of being in a classroom when it’s clearly time to play videogames without sleep keeps biting me so hard all I think of is “getting an A” so I can get people to shut up.
All I do is work on whatever they give me,
finish early,
then draw a lamb somewhere.

But whatever. It doesn’t really matter what I think.
‘Cause in the end, it all adds up to…
…
Money.
You know how odd that is? How everything always adds up to money? It always does when you really think about it. Think about it sometime. It’s pretty depressing when it gets to you.